This post has nothing to do with priests. Or rabbis. Or bars. It's about inappropriate humor in public places.
Following our workout at the gym one night, my friend and I stopped by Walmart. I usually avoid this store like the plague at what I call the rush hour of shopping. Since it was late at night, I figured we were safe. I was wrong. My buddy loaded her cart with items on her list and then proceeded to the dairy section for the cheddar which was on sale. She picked up enough cheese to feed a small army. It was a good deal. I thought to myself, if she runs into a hungry cracker wielding infantry, she's a goner.
I picked up a package, as well as yet another eggplant that will probably go bad before I actually get around to cooking it. It's what I do. I buy out of the ordinary produce and then I let it sit there. I digress.
We were waiting our turn at the check out when my friend commented that she is cursed with always picking the slowest lines. The man in front of us jumped into the conversation and was commiserating with us. Just then an Asian family pushed their carts past us. They were filled to overflowing with Pringles potato chips and bottles of Pepsi.
My friend and I looked at each other in disbelief. Who the heck buys that much junk food at a time? I thought to myself , "Wow. That can't be very healthy". Mr. Chatterbox in front of us surmised that they probably had a convenience store (otherwise known as a "dep" if you're a Montrealer) and were going to sell the discounted items at a higher price . He repeated it again. Just in case we hadn't heard him the first time. He was taking his job as the chain store food police seriously.
The minutes passed, the line was not moving any quicker. Apparently standing in line quietly waiting your turn is great fodder for some to try their hand at stand up comedy. Our fellow Walmart shopper asked us if we knew why Chinese people never go to a hockey game and gather in the corner. I was intrigued, I thought I was about to learn some interesting cultural tradition. Drum roll please....apparently it's because if they do, they will open another convenience store. Ba-doom-boom!
Cue the crickets.
My friend and I just stared at him and then we looked at each other. It was an uncomfortable moment. Who tells jokes like this anymore? Welcome to the 21st century, dude. Get out much? When he saw that we weren't on the same page as he was, he quietly took his cart to another line.
I am of the opinion that deep in the heart of every person is a little bit of that Walmart man, albeit in varying degrees. There are people who pride themselves on saying that they are not racist in the least and that everyone is created equal. I don't buy it. Why? Because, we are all human, and as humans we are born with the predisposition to act like dirtbags every now and again. However, it doesn't make it okay to say certain things out loud..
I read an article recently about how the face of the world is changing. Flash forward 50-60 years from now and the garden variety pale faced blue eyed light haired Caucasians will be the new visible minority. I can't help but wonder what guys like our friend in line will have to say about that. Not sure I'd care to know.
I love conversations about God. There's something about discussing and acknowledging the omnipotence of our Creator with fellow Christians that always fuels my thirst for knowledge. As with most things in life though, there is always the polar opposite of those conversations.
I recently found myself in a conversation with a family member who is a believer yet does not attend church nor study scripture. I like to compare this statement to saying you're a NASCAR driver but you show up at the race track with a bicycle.
When pressed further to answer why the lack of church attendance, the usual list of excuses come up. They range from church is an institution created by man to control people, as is the Bible, people at church are too "uptight", I'm not into that right now, but maybe when I get older, I already pray and I don't need to go to church.
I understand these excuses because I used a couple of them in the past too. That was before the switch was turned "on". Then I saw how unintentionally arrogant those statements were. Here is my humble opinion of what is dangerous about those statements. What if you don't get to the "older" part of your life? There are no guarantees that you will die quietly in your sleep at the age of 100 years. What if you go to your grave never having truly known your maker?
As far as "being controlled" goes, nothing could be further from the truth. Following Christ is one of the greatest freedoms you will experience in your short tenure on this planet. Nothing else promises the lasting feeling of peace you will experience while following the Prince of Peace himself. Acknowledging him as your king frees you from the ways of the world. Personally, I no longer feel the need or pressure to please anyone.
The one statement that sounds like nails on a chalk board to me is the "I know there's SOMETHING out there, but not sure what/who?" In Western society it's very easy to find out what/who. All you need to do is walk through the doors of God's house and spend time amongst His saints. We are free to do this without fear of retribution. There really are some areas in the world where you might get killed for your declaration of faith to Jesus. It sounds far away because its not in our own back yards, but it remains true just the same.
Why is it so much easier to believe in new ageism, Buddhism, wiccans and, clairvoyants. Trendy is winning out over basic simple universal Truth. Once the glitter falls away and you're out a good chunk of change, you are left with nothing.
The proof of God as creator is right under our noses. All one needs to do is look at the majesty of a tree, flowers, birth, animals, plants, the way your body functions automatically, etc. . All you need to do is truly open your eyes . Proof is everywhere.
Eventually the ages old, tired, unoriginal question pops up: "If there is a God, why does he allow such bad things to happen". To which we predictably answer "Free will". All honesty, I've never been a fan of such a cut and dry answer and I'm pretty sure it rarely leads a skeptic to exclaim "Eureka!!! NOW I get it!".
I may not be able adequately summarize all of God's majesty, but I can tell you what He is not. He is not a genie in a bottle itching to grant you three wishes. He's not your get out of jail free card. He is not a magician. He is not a promise that nothing will ever go astray in your life. If you really want to know who He is, just talk to Him. He will always bend His ear to hear you calling His name.
Hi! I'm Chris, an empty nester living in Montreal and making the most of this stage in my life. I love cooking for friends and family, DIY projects, decorating and writing.