As the days to my milestone birthday grow near I find myself mulling over events of my past. As the song goes: regrets I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention. That may be true for Frank Sinatra, but as for me, I'd definitely like a couple of "do overs". Here goes.
I regret not having paid more attention when my dad would tell me about his days in the military in the second world war.
I regret having wasted years in an on again off again relationship with a man who ended up walking someone else down the aisle after ruthlessly stomping all over my heart repeatedly.
I regret not having realized my worth and bending over backwards for people who have not done the same for me.
I regret having doubted myself when red flags would go up when confronted with questionable behavior or motives.
All things being equal, I can't say that I'm bitter. I'm happy. Happier than I've ever been, actually. I have stopped caring what people think and have learned to love myself. Youth truly is wasted on the young. Never before have I been so aware of what it is to live in the moment.
Today, the smallest things bring me the greatest joy. My senses are heightened; colors, textures, sounds and tastes are spectacular to me. Each day is met with child like enthusiasm. There are times when I am so happy that I feel as though I am head over heels in love. I guess in a way I am; I have finally begun living fully in the present.
So, although there are things I wish I could undo from the past, I see now the wisdom that comes with age. A life with no regrets of some sort is a life that has not been lived to the fullest. Everyone should have a couple of stories about how they have thrown caution to the wind and have taken a chance. I know I do. Perhaps there are not regrets after all.
Hi! I'm Chris, an empty nester living in Montreal and making the most of this stage in my life. I love cooking for friends and family, DIY projects, decorating and writing.